read (or listen to) this first

INTRODUCTION

First of all, thank you for visiting my website!  I believe that your time is invaluable.  The thing with time is that once you spend it there is no getting it back.  So I have two purposes for this introduction.  The first is to give you information that will help you to decide if this website is, as is commonly said, 'worth your time'.   I'm hoping you conclude that it is.  If so, the second goal is to orient you to how this blog is organized so that you get the most out of your experience.

WHAT IS THIS WEBSITE? 

It's a space where I can share my personal take on a number of issues I am passionate about along with other life-inspired musings. Basically, it is my personal 'social commentary' intermingled with some life journaling.

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMERS

Two important disclaimers to begin with...

• First, let me be clear from the beginning that the views and perspectives expressed here are solely that of my own and NOT of my family, friends, or employer. So please direct any disagreements you may have towards me, not them.

• Second, I reserve the right to change my opinions. Please know that I don't write or speak ex cathedra. Each piece reflects my understanding and opinion on whatever I am talking about when it is published. I take great pride in disagreeing with my past self. That’s called GROWTH. So please remember to keep that context in mind.

an appeal for an audience (why i am ‘worth your time’)

The great philosopher, Aristotle, once laid out the three characteristics of effective communication, and his thoughts have long been used as foundational to the study of the art of persuasion or rhetoric. In summary, he argued that people tend to embrace another person’s expressed ideas and call to action (behavior change) because the audience believes the communicator to be…

• a good and knowledgeable person (what Aristotle called “ethos”) - That is, the communicator is a) an ethical person/a person of character and b) has relevant personal (or ‘lived’) experience and knowledge (e.g. formal education) related to the subject the communicator is addressing. The audience may have personally observed these qualities in the communicator, or they may have heard from others they admire that the person sharing “is a good person” and “knows what they are talking about”.

• a reasonable person (what Aristotle called “logos”) - That is, the communicator appears to be making rational or logical arguments for the ideas and corresponding actions that they are asking their audience to embrace.

• a genuinely passionate person (what Aristotle called “pathos”) - That is, the communicator shows heartfelt emotions and feels moved or compelled even to share with the audience.

It’s up to you, the audience of this blog—or however, wherever, and whenever else you find occasion to be exposed to my mad ramblings—to discern whether or not I meet these criteria.

Concerning my “logos”, you’ll have to read or listen to specific articles I have posted on this blog (or content I share from other platforms or in person) to determine if I am being rational and logical. I know I do my best to be reasonable and avoid logical fallacies, but I would never assume I do that all the time. So if something doesn’t make sense, point it out in the comments, preferably without attacking me personally—that’s an ad hominem!

As far as my “pathos” is concerned, I would hope that the time and energy I put into sharing (on this platform and elsewhere), along with the very words I use to express myself, will go a long way in convincing you of just how genuinely passionate I am. I believe you will find many emotions on these digital pages, from rage, to heartbreak, to exuberance and a hundred emotions in between.

Concerning the “ethos” of one Kirt Everett Lewis, I will say this: I believe that I am a good person. I personally believe that no human being is bad. However, all human beings, including yours truly, have experienced the intentional and unintentional wounds of life. We tragically develop unhealthy coping mechanisms that, in our minds, are ensuring our physical or emotional survival and safety, but in reality, causing harm to ourselves and the world we touch.

It should be obvious that for me to claim to be a good person does not mean I have been, currently am, or ever will be a ‘perfect’ person, if by ‘perfect person’ we mean someone who has become completely cured of all habitual and harmful trauma responses and therefore lives every moment of their lives in a manner that is completely loving towards myself, other fellow humans, and the world around me. I happen to believe that true healing and wholeness is actually a multi-generational campaign. I am just trying to do my part to take responsibility for my own harmful choices and make better ones each day, and in doing so hopefully nudge this world a little closer to something resembling a loving and peaceful place before my time comes to exit stage death.

But what about the second aspect of ethos, my personal experience and knowledge about the things I try to address?

It might first be good for one to ask, “Kirt, what subjects or issues or causes are you most passionate about?” I’m so glad you asked! While it might not be very ‘warm and fuzzy’, I am going to describe the causes I am giving my life to in terms of ideologies and systems I and many others are fighting against. Within those conversations. I believe it will become clear what I am fighting for.

With that said, here is a summary of my ‘soap boxes’ and my relevant personal experience and knowledge that should lend some credibility to what I am saying. (Note: as many will observe, there is quite a bit of overlap or what the civil rights leader and scholar, Kimberle Crenshaw, coined, “intersectionality”.)

I am fighting against…

• The abuses and power of religious institutions - I am speaking specifically about religious institutions that are based on exclusivist ideologies, which is the foundation of much of our societies’ tendencies to engage in extremely harmful ‘othering’. I know that there are other spiritual traditions that are very peaceful and highly individualized and therefore not given to the pull of institutionalism. Rather, the institutions I oppose have historically and presently amassed significant economic, cultural, and political power. Through this power, they seek to systematically force their ignorance and bigotry on others, often at the expense of individual human rights and the oppression of minorities, especially those who do not adhere to their dogmas and related dictations on how to live. While seeking to dismantle the systemic entitlements these institutions and their followers wield at a broader societal level, I am also passionate about addressing religious trauma (physical and emotional). I want to see Religious Trauma Syndrome, as it was originally coined by survivor and psychologist Dr. Marlene Winell, widely and formally recognized and addressed in laws that will protect others from being victims in the future.

  My relevant experience/knowledge: I am a survivor of a cult, in my case the cult of American Evangelical Christianity, arguably the most harmful and powerful religious institution in America. From the day I was born, I was brought up “in the faith” during a period of time (1970’s-1980’s) heavily influenced by the rise of the so-called “religious right”. But I bring perspectives to this conversation as not only an insider adherent to this particular brand of religious fundamentalism but as a former leader in the church. In preparation for this role which I felt “called” into, I graduated from two evangelical academic institutions (Multnomah University and Western Seminary). I eventually worked in several vocational leadership roles from 1999-2017, including being a Youth, Associate, Interim Senior, and Senior Pastor. I was on staff at a variety of evangelical churches, mainly American Baptist, an independent charismatic congregation, and a Christian and Missionary Alliance fellowship.

  But I particularly made my mark in Christian ministry in the realm of ‘faith-based’ social justice and welfare, especially in my work with refugees. I directed what was at the time the second-largest refugee resettlement agency field office in the nation with World Relief, an organization that has served as the humanitarian arm of the National Association of Evangelicals since after World War 2. While there, I worked hard with our staff to mobilize over a thousand volunteers from mostly evangelical churches to support over 6,000 refugees arriving in the city and county of Sacramento, California. During this time with World Relief, I also engaged with the refugee crisis more broadly with the Refugee Highway Partnership, a global network of Evangelical Christian churches and ministries working with forcibly displaced peoples all over the globe. I served as the Co-Facilitator for the North America Region and was a member of the Global Leadership Council for the RHP.

  I left the church at the end of 2017 and publicly announced my departure from the Christian religion in 2019.

  Since my exodus from Evangelical Christianity, I have connected with two individuals who are also survivors and professionals in the field of recovery from cult/religious trauma. We have been collaborating on a vision to establish a religious/cult recovery center. I also participate in The Clergy Project and contribute to other conversations and efforts aimed at reversing the harm done particularly by fundamentalist religious institutions.

• Ignorance and intolerance towards non-traditional sexual identities and expressions - Related to the abuses and powers of religious institutions, there is significant work to be done to advance a greater understanding of and tolerance towards all sexual identities and expressions of sexuality. Here in the US, oppressive laws and a culture of violence aimed at those who aren’t “good little heterosexual, married boys and girls” are rampant. In certain other countries, this discrimination can even be violently barbaric.

  My relevant experience/knowledge: I grew up in a family steeped in Evangelical “purity culture” with all of the fear, shame, and sexual dysfunction that comes with it. Much of my recovery journey and mental health therapy—along with ingesting a substantial number of books, articles, and podcasts on the subject—has opened my eyes to a beautifully expansive universe of sexual identity and expression. Added to this, I am the father of a brave gay daughter. I am highly committed to advocating for a world where she, and others like her, feel seen, safe, and supported.

• Stigmas surrounding mental health and the shamefully inadequate resources our society allocates to address mental health care - Numerous studies—along with the everyday sobering observations of individuals psychologically struggling—make it crystal clear that we as a society are not doing nearly enough to care for our minds. Institutions and businesses crank out products and services that knowingly harm their constituents’ and customers’ psychological well-being with little if any accountability from our government. It is clear that bottom lines trump sound minds.

  My relevant experience/knowledge: With my departure from over 40 years in a cult, as well as being a victim of childhood sexual abuse, I have embarked on several years of professional therapy. I no longer feel shame in talking about my own psychological struggles, including depression. I believe in the dignity and courage of the simple statement: “I need help!”

  The particular model of therapy that I have benefited from the most is called Internal Family Systems (IFS). I love sharing what I have learned and what I continue to discover through IFS.

  I’ve also become an advocate for my two daughters and partner to receive the mental health resources they need, desire, and deserve. Yet like so many others, I’ve also run into the ridiculousness of the American healthcare system, trying to navigate both a deficit of ‘in-network’ providers and the eventual steep costs and still scant availability of out-of-network providers. Like too many others, the choice is between ignoring our mental health needs or getting the care we need at the expense of skyrocketing personal, high-interest debt.

  So I speak to this issue from a place of deep personal experience and passion.

• Colonial nationalism and the gross economic exploitation and violent wars it instigates - Fueled by greedy capitalism and ethnocentrism, the cult of blind so-called “patriotism” has arguably rivaled exclusivist religious institutions for the title of causing the most suffering, oppression, and death in the world. I’m particularly passionate about undermining 1) nationalism’s cruel and often racist policies towards immigration and border control and 2) nationalism’s blood money (i.e. America’s Department of Defense budget) and its corrupt public-private infrastructure that President Dwight D. Eisenhower ominously called “the military-industrial complex”.

  My relevant experience/knowledge: As was previously mentioned, I spent nearly seven years at World Relief working primarily in the field of refugee resettlement, but also engaged in the area of immigration services, particularly for undocumented immigrants and foreign-born victims of human trafficking. My time as the Director of World Relief Sacramento office also overlapped with the 2016 Presidential Election, with all the well-known polarizing and xenophobic rhetoric that was central to the campaign of then-candidate Donald Trump. I was there when the newly sworn-in President Trump and his thinly veiled white supremacist Administration leaders instituted the Muslim travel ban.

  After leaving World Relief, I worked for a DC-based non-profit focused on supporting Iraqis and Afghans who wanted to come to the US, or those who had already arrived through the Special Immigrant Visa Program. That Visa, created during the Bush Administration, provided an immigration pathway for foreign nationals who assisted US military or government personnel during the US’s invasion and occupation of their respective countries.

  Years before these experiences, I was inspired by my then-evangelical patriotism to join the Army post 9/11. This included a tour of duty in Iraq at the beginning of that war, during which I served on the 75th Exploitation Task Force’s (XTF) Mobile Exploitation Team (MET) Alpha. In the early months of the war, MET Alpha was one of the primary units responsible for searching for weapons of mass destruction (WMDs), which was the core justification for the entire war, or so it was claimed by the Bush Administration. As is widely known, the search was in vain and no WMDs were found. While very much re-imagined in typical Hollywood fashion, the story of this failed mission would later be depicted in a major motion picture, The Green Zone starring Matt Damon.

  I have seen firsthand and regrettably contributed to the horrific impact of nationalism.

• Ecenomic inequality, classicism, and capitalism - Capitalism is clearly broke! Cruel exploitation and unfair inequality are inherent within this economic system. It commodifies everything and everyone into assets of leveled value to the opulent benefit of the modern-day fiefdom. Add in other devaluing ideologies (e.g. racism), and the result is what we live in today—a wasteland of more and more people just barely getting except for a select few live like the royalty of years past if not even better. Like nationalism and organized religion, this failed economic philosophy and its resulting system must go. We can and must do better at finding a way to share this world and meet all of our needs, and by “all” I mean ALL—not just human beings (more on this shortly).

  My relevant experience/knowledge: From growing up in one of the wealthiest counties in America (Marin County in the San Francisco Bay Area) to spending time and working with those facing crippling poverty, I feel I bring some unique perspectives to this issue. Since 2019, I have professionally worked on advancing economic equality and empowerment. While I was with the International Rescue Committee, I worked with the City of Sacramento to launch their new Financial Empowerment Center, where low to moderate-income households could receive free, professional financial coaching. Currently, I work for United Way, managing their Guaranteed Income Program, where we have partnered with the City and County of Sacramento and other private institutions to provide hundreds of households with unrestricted cash aid.

• The exploitation of our environment and violence towards animals - There is undeniable evidence that the way we human beings treat the rest of the world is unsustainable. But beyond that, more and more of us are embracing empathy and understanding beyond our species. We’re motivated by more than just a utilitarian need to preserve the environment for our own survival. We see a direct connection between the legacy of violence human beings have towards each other and the horrific ways we exploit and murder other living animals, the land, air, and the sea. We feel an ethical imperative to apply “the golden rule” to the living world around us.

  My relevant experience/knowledge: I am no expert, but I have been moved by what I have learned from other scientists and advocates. Like so many others, I have been trying to do my part to reduce the harmful impact of my behaviors on the environment for quite some time. Several years ago I met a compassionate person who began to expose me to the cruelty of factory farming. I started to reduce my consumption of dairy and meats, and tried to buy “cage-free”, but sadly I still maintained a cognitive dissonance that justified going no further than that. Then I met my beautiful and intelligent partner, who has been vegan for over 12 years. I decided to join her in eating in such a way that shows love for all living things. Beyond this, I have become keenly interested in other radical changes in our daily living, including homesteading. So the thoughts that I share on preserving the environment and not harming other sentient beings come from a genuine heart and true commitment. I hope that those who take time to engage with my thoughts will join me on this journey.

• Patriarchy, toxic masculinity, and racism - Men have ruled the world for far too long. Over the last several centuries this has been especially true of white men of European descent. The results of these twisted, symbiotic ideologies and the systems of oppression they devised are deeply disturbing. Many reasonable men recognize that any system that elevates their gender, and in most cases their race as well, above other genders and races is deeply unethical. Add to this the hubris of a culture of macho-ism or what is more commonly described as toxic masculinity. Progress has been made, but there are far too many examples of the stubborn hold that predominantly white patriarchy still has on this world.

  My relevant experience/knowledge: I’m a male. I’m a white male. I’m an American, white male! If that isn’t the definition of entitled patriarchy, I don’t know what is! So my credibility to speak on this subject comes from a place of confession and growing humility as someone seeking to become an anti-racist, anti-patriarchy ally to women and other minorities long oppressed by white men. On top of that, when you become the father of two daughters, things get personal when other men try to dictate who they are and how they will live. My response to that? Hell-fucking-no!

Each of these battles represents very real choices…

between freedom or oppression…

generosity or greed…

community or tyranny…

peace or violence…

love or hate.

They have raged on long before I was born and, sadly, will most likely continue long after I am gone.

However, I feel compelled to speak to each of them, challenging myself and others to imagine and strive for something better. So many others have stood bravely, especially those deemed intrinsically lesser in the face of those who claimed superiority and wielded destructive power. Echoing their legacy with my own words and actions is the least I can do to honor their sacrifices. I’m also driven by the aching hope for a world where all children of the future will grow up in peace, and that these same children will one day die of old age with little if any of the vicious scars our species has proliferated thus far.

So I hope that in my time and in my own unique expression, history—even if only known to a few—will have found me to be a bright, humorous, compassionate, and courageous voice.

so did i convince you to give me a shot and take a deeper dive into my brain and journey? If yes, great! let me finish this intro to my blog by breaking down the style and structure of its CONTENT.

WHAT'S THE FORMAT and style?

The format is mostly a blog that sometimes includes a podcast option where you can listen to me reading the blog post.  Just know that if you are listening to a podcast you are likely missing out on some important links, so make sure to go back later to the text version to explore those resources.  Note that in addition to podcasts being embedded in some blog posts, they can also be found on I-Tunes.

Beyond the blog articles with the audio option, there are some pieces that are purely a podcast or a vlog.  More on this in a minute.

What about the style?  So much of the 'news' we digest here in America is nothing more than a glorified sound-bite.  We've been conditioned to consume fast information, with the average local or network story running between forty-one seconds to two minutes and twenty-three seconds.  My goal is to engage my audience at a slightly deeper level, hopefully inspiring further research and conversation.  So the style of the content you will find on this website might be similar to a piece you would hear on NPR's Morning Edition and The Osgood File, with most pieces taking between five and nine minutes to listen to or read.  A few pieces, especially interviews, go a bit longer but never more than 20 minutes. 

A brief comment on comments: Did you find something so interesting that you really want to have a conversation about it? Feel free to comment. I’ll try to reply when I have time, but don’t assume I always will. I will give no time to trolls.

My recommendation is that you also seek out someone you personally know to talk about something my writing stirred up. I guarantee that the outcome will be vastly better than time wasted on eternal internet threads. Bonus points if you know they come from a different background and perspective than you do.

how is the content organized?

The content of my publications falls under four broad categories: Religion and Philosophy, Social Justice and Politics, Pop-Culture, and Other Life-Inspired Musings. Under each of these are some categories that narrow the focus a bit. Each of the causes I just spoke about tends to fall under most of these categories. But as you will see, there are a few other topics I will post on from time to time, ranging from lighter fare to more serious matters

On philosophy and Religion

Writings/podcasts found here are dedicated to the big questions we all wrestle with in our attempt to discover and live out our purpose on this planet.  I organize my writings around the following categories…

On Social Justice and politics

We as humans seem to excel at creating systems that enslave.  I'll define 'slavery' as anything that violates an individual or community's agency.  The criteria for determining who is the slave and who is the master are largely based upon factors such as level of education, economic class, race, gender, sexual orientation, religious affiliation, nationality, or a combination of several of these traits as an identifiable ethnicity. The end result is some pretty messed up shit, some injustices being painfully obvious with others being oh so dangerously subtle. My writings on social justice and politics are organized under the following categories...

Though each piece is unique, some are designed to compliment one another and run in a series.  On occasion, a Rage Against the Machine piece sets the table by introducing a particular issue.  Then in one or more Profiles in Courage posts we explore a more personal angle by listening to 'freedom fighters' who are seeking to address that particular injustice.

Have an injustice you think I should cover in a future Rage Against the Machine piece or someone that you think I should highlight in an upcoming Profiles in Courage podcast?  Again, you can suggest names using the Suggestion Box.

On Pop-Culture

The term 'culture' is extremely broad with multiple nuanced definitions and as such has become a source of great confusion.  I'm using the word here to refer to common activities which express the beliefs and values of an identifiable group of human beings.  Enter, American pop-culture.  My writings on pop-culture are organized as follows…

Here is my scoring system for Buttery Fingers...

The scoring is as follows...

Other Life-Inspired Musings

This is essentially a personal journal and features under two categories:

What's the schedule?

I posted a shit ton of content back in 2018 (averaged 7 posts a month). I had a lot to vent on and was in-between jobs for about 5 months, so I had the time. Now I post when I can. I do hope to pick up the pace soon. For those of you who are new to the site, take the time to get caught up on previous posts. Also, follow me on Instagram if you want to see what’s up on a more daily basis. I am also hoping to start posting more quick takes on my YouTube channel moving forward as well. Links to both can be found at the top and bottom of the website.

WHAT'S MY "ENDGAME"?

I essentially have two goals with this website.  One is selfishly therapeutic--that is, there are just some things I've got to "get off my chest".  Second, I hope that what I publish here genuinely helps others in their own navigation of this mysterious and fleeting thing we call "life". 

IF THERE ARE OTHERS WHO YOU THINK WOULD BENEFIT FROM THis website, I WOULD BE VERY GRATEFUL IF YOU took a few minutes to share it with them.

Respectfully,
Kirt E. Lewis.